johnpaulca
12,036 posts
msg #68823
- Ignore johnpaulca |
10/27/2008 10:10:41 AM
CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.
CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.
INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.
PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.
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maxreturn
745 posts
msg #68826
- Ignore maxreturn |
10/27/2008 10:38:56 AM
JP....thanks for comedic relief. Very funny!...and at the same time...sad :(
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bpmiller1
26 posts
msg #68931
- Ignore bpmiller1 |
11/1/2008 2:43:20 PM
Yep, That is a laugh. One correction though Change the Yhoo $240. to $24. ....YHOO was never that high
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